My Story Part 2

First of all, thank all of you SO much for the birthday wishes, it made my day!!

Now for the continuation:

In the summer of 2009, God gave my mom a dream. It was a horrific nightmare about the mistreatment of special needs orphans in Easten Europe. God gave her the word ‘urgent’. She absolutely knew when she saw little “Barbara’s” face with the word ‘URGENT’ in the subject line of the email that she was ours. She was a little four year old girl in Serbia with big brown eyes and many severe congenital heart defects who wasn’t even supposed to be alive, much less make it to four years old. God also gave us her new name, “Christyn Joy”, which means ‘one who holds Christ in her heart’. All of us were on board, even after my parents explained that she “might not make it”. There was seriously not ONE SINGLE doubt in my mind that she would not survive the necessary surgery to fix her very broken heart.

My parents traveled to Serbia in October of 2009 and we became Chrissie's family the same month. From the moment she arrived Chrissie had captivated our hearts. I remember the first night she arrived, it was late and Chrissie was clinging to Mom and Dad. We all decided to sleep on Mom and Dad’s floor and while Mom was getting ready for bed I crawled into bed next to Chrissie and she snuggled close and hugged my neck so tightly. She later became famous for her choke hold hugs:).

It became apparent that she would not only captivate our hearts, but also the heart of every single person she came in contact with. From grocery store clerks, to her many specialists, everyone was in love with this miracle girl. The question in the back of everyone’s mind was, “When will she have the surgery?”. We scheduled a few times, but God kept delaying it in one way or another.

We did everything together:





This may seem like a rabbit trail or a sidetrack, but I need to tell Kiefer’s story now! Many of you know that in January of 2010 there was an awful earthquake in Haiti, and orphans were allowed to get out on Humanitarian Parole. My mom saw another picture of an orphan who would soon join our family! Kenwetchly Filostin (King Wetchly, as he says now) was my brother, no doubt. His face was just so darn cute!! His new name was ‘Kiefer’. God worked out a ton of details super fast, and I was able to travel with my mom to Miami to in April of 2010 to pick him up.
Some pics of Kiefer:

Kiefer was only 22 months old, and Chrissie’s open heart surgery was scheduled for April 19th. Two weeks after Kiefer came home! We knew that Mom and Dad would have to spend a lot of time at the hospital with Chrissie, and we couldn’t understand why God had brought us another kid right before such a monstrous event. But He knew better!

I think this is one of the only pictures we have of Kiefer and Chrissie together, he wouldn’t smile, but she was determined:).

You can read Chrissie’s heart surgery chronicles starting HERE. On May 19, 2010, Chrissie had open-heart surgery. On the day she had her surgery, she died, but God brought her back to us. My mom and dad were with my sister in the hospital. From my perspective, those days were pretty dark. I was only 12 and I was taking care of a two year old and felt very responsible for him. Kiefer was still learning to talk, didn't understand English, must have been scared out of his mind, and had lots of nasty diapers due to the multiple parasites he had in Haiti. I missed my mom and hated seeing my precious Chris-Chris in so much pain.  Then there were the days when we would all huddle around the computer and check for updates every five minutes. I would pack every Friday for all of us to go to San Antonio to stay at a campground and hopefully spend some time with Mom while my Nana stayed with Chrissie. Then every Sunday night I would unpack and start the next grueling week. I know for sure that without Jesus, there is no way I could have gotten through that. I cried myself to sleep with pitiful cries for help from Jehovah many nights. I’m not trying to complain, I’ve just read this story through my mom’s eyes many times, and don’t know if the kid’s view has ever been posted. Kiefer was such a joy, though, during those hard times. He would crack us up and was so fun to play with.
I remember the day so vividly. It was 4am and Dad woke me up and asked me to come sleep with Kiefer because Chrissie wasn’t doing well and he had to go to the hospital. I prayed in and out of sleep until at 5am, our teacher Stephanie (who lives on our ranch) woke me up saying she needed me to come now. I hopped out of bed and met everyone in the my room. There were five sleepy kids with fearful eyes sitting cross legged on the floor when Stephanie put the phone on speaker and all I could hear was my mom’s sobs. The minute I heard it I looked at everyone else and started shaking my head, rocking back and forth, while tears just ran from my eyes. My mom finally managed to get out that Chrissie had gone to be with Jesus. Even through all of the hospital stuff, I never EVER thought she would not make it. EVER. It felt like I had been punched and I went numb. No way, God, nuh uh.

We drove to the hospital early that Wednesday morning and I looked out the window at all of the cars, wondering how anyone could possibly go on with their day when my world had just shattered. I cried harder than I ever had that day. I couldn’t bear to look at those little pig tails sticking out of a blanket that covered her. I sank against her room’s wall and listened to K-LOVE as I tried to not pass out. There were a lot of hospital staff and people coming to send their condolences. I didn’t even notice. I was just in shock.

That whole summer went by in a daze. Every time I thought of her, which seemed like every minute, it felt like a knife was being plunged into my stomach and I got a stomach ache. Kiefer was the only thing that got us out of bed in the morning. I can’t tell you a whole lot that went on that summer. It felt like I “woke up” that fall when I was in the musical Pinnochio and made a lot of new friends (and, as only God would have it, we go to their church now and are still friends). I struggled a lot with wondering why God would ever do this to me. Me, me, me. Didn’t He take into account that I would be crushed?! I was bitter. I put on a happy face, but I just didn’t know how I could get over that nagging question, “Why, God?”. Now, that seems so cliche, but it’s true. I still have not answered that question, and probably wont until I get to heaven, but I have come back to my Papa God. It’s been a process, and it took a while, but in order to heal the hurt I harbored toward God, I felt like I needed to forgive Him. I know God doesn't sin, and therefore, doesn't need to be forgiven, but I had to come to grips with all the emotion I had in my heart.  I now fully trust that He works ALL things out for the good of those who love Him. This took off another deep layer of my selfishness. It’s just not about me. It’s about giving the deserving God of Wonders the honor He deserves! It’s about the time I DID get with the girl who changed my life. It’s about learning to treasure every friendship and love to the fullest. It’s about Jesus. This stirs me up, guys! The Holy Spirit is all over this! Even though I couldn’t see it then, I can now, and I thank the Healer of my heart.
Oh, that summer we got two new additions:). Naomi Faith and Asher. Naomi was brought home from Haiti a few days before her 18th birthday, and Asher was brought to us for two years as respite care.


I didn't mean for my story to be three parts, but it's proving too much for two:)

To be continued.......